The carpet felt more like concrete, as I collapsed beneath the table and erupted into a violent explosion of salty tears and self-hatred. The world I had known was forever changed in the unraveling of my shame, finding a shattered mirror and a fist and a whisper, "wherever you go, there you are." Find me … Continue reading “…It’s a Cold and Broken, Hallelujah”
My last sermon, ever.
I believe that I've lost belief in promises and choruses and confessions of faith and doubtthat flannel graph stories of redemption can be recapitulated and monday follows a blood red sky and sunday never comes.I believe in angels in blue jeans.I believe in Ambria's promises and Ashlyn's nail polish and Mariah's runaway tears. I believe in bonfires and … Continue reading I Believe
This morning I sat with my girls on the couch while they waited for the elementary school bus to pick them up and take them away down the winding, mountain road. I couldn't help but see each of them through the lens of my own childhood.Mariah is in 5th grade now. She is my twin … Continue reading Out of Hiding (Father’s Song)
Lately I've been thinking about my own funeral.No, I don't have plans to end my life, and I do not have a death wish. Whatever discouraging thoughts of depression or self-harm I may have wrestled with are usually chased away by the morning sunrise. I used to dwell on the fatalism of death by exposure, … Continue reading Thoughts on Life and Death
She had cried a thousand tears by the time I met her.Last week, a local homeless woman stumbled into my circle of care, asking for help. Selena had been homeless for several months, and a few months ago she lost custody of her daughter, Arayana. While staying with extended family, Arayana had drowned in a … Continue reading Every Act of Love…